You are allowed to ask these questions before you give notice. Asking does not commit you to anything. The answers show whether quitting is your only door or just the first one you noticed.
Local option: New Plan Care gives families in the St. Louis area in-home help so a parent can stay home: companionship, help with bathing and dressing, meals, and overnight care. Call (314) 405-0887.
Ask HR what leave already exists
Start with the leave you may already have. In the United States, the federal Family and Medical Leave Act can give eligible employees unpaid, job-protected leave to care for a parent with a serious health condition. Eligibility depends on the size of your employer, how long you have worked there, and how many hours you logged in the past year. Check the current rules with the U.S. Department of Labor, then ask HR whether you qualify and what paperwork they need from you and from your parent's doctor.
Some states run their own paid family leave programs with separate eligibility rules. Ask whether your state has one and whether caring for a parent counts. If your parent's needs come in pieces rather than one long stretch, ask whether leave can be taken in blocks or on a reduced schedule.
Get the answers in writing
A verbal yes from a manager is not the same as a policy. Ask for the following in writing, and keep copies:
How many weeks of leave you can take and whether it runs at the same time as any paid time off.
Whether your job is held while you are on leave, and what happens if it is not.
The last day your health coverage continues and what you must do to keep it.
Whether you can return to the same role or an equivalent one.
Whether a part-time, shifted, or remote role is an option if full leave does not work.
Count the benefits clock
Benefits usually end on a schedule nobody reminds you about. Find the exact last day of each one before you pick a stop date:
Health insurance: ask the last covered day and what continuation coverage would cost. Continuation coverage often means paying the full premium plus an administrative charge, so ask for the exact figure in writing and compare it with any coverage your parent or household can use.
Retirement match: find out whether contributions stop on your last paycheck and whether you are vested in the employer match.
Life and disability insurance: find out whether the coverage ends, whether it can be converted, and who to call.
Paid time off: ask whether unused hours are paid out and when.
Find the return door
Ask how long your position stays open if you step away and whether you can be rehired after a break. Ask whether any role in the company is part time, remote, or on a changed schedule. Write down the name of the person who answered and the day you asked. If the answer changes later, you will have a record.
Write your own one-page version
Before you decide, put the household on one page: what you earn, what the household needs each month, what leave or continuation covers, how many months you could go without a paycheck, and what you would have to replace or pay for. This is not a plan for forever. It is the paper that tells you which door you are walking through and how long it can stay open.
If you want to talk through the local options while you prepare, the Local Help for Caregivers in St. Louis page lists where to start. The Sources page shows where the rules above come from, so you can check them against current versions.
If the answers come back thin, that is information too. You can take the leave you are offered, ask for more, and still keep the decision open for another week.